Watch it.

Guys, I just really really this video. And the song. The song is awesome, too. But he video is SO GOOD.

So watch it.

One of those times

It's one of those times where you want to crawl in bed and never get up.

Not because life is so incredibly hard, or because you can't possibly finish that paper by midnight, or because you've had 6 midterms in 2 weeks or because times are hard with family.

No, just because it means calm.

It means bundling up in covers and getting toasty and laying your head on that soft pillow.

It means waking up naturally to the sound of birds outside your window and sunshine on your forehead and a complete lack of fist slamming on the snooze button. Because no one likes to wake up to resilient beeping, even when we know we must.

It means putting things on hold and not worrying about laundry or homework or appointments or tests or even relationships.

Those relationships that mean so much to you, the friends and most importantly the family. The importance of the relationship will not be lost, but couldn't it just be placed on hold for a bit? Because a full 9 hours of sleep sounds so peaceful.

It means eating grapefruit all you want and reading a new book.

Or reading an old book, because no matter how many times your eyes see the same words, they never get old. The characters you love will always be there to wrap you up in a warm embrace and give you a minute in a different world.

It means walking around in leggings and fuzzy polka dot socks because they're just so warm and cozy and no one is going to see you, anyway. And besides all that, you like them.

It means getting to bed when you mean to and waking up when you want to because no one needs a shoulder to cry on or a friend to listen.

But then what's the point?

We all want this perfect world completely devoid of worry and selflessness. Because sometimes it feels so much nicer to be selfish. And it feels nice for a bit, but eventually you start to feel sluggish. You start to lose a desire to do anything but watch Harry Potter movies over and over again. Eventually makeup doesn't seem worth it when you're just going to take it off in a few hours anyway. And why make your bed when you'll sleep in it again in a bit? And of course it wouldn't hurt to never touch the floor all day, but stay in that bed of yours.

And time passes and feelings start to change.

And then eventually you really want to put on makeup and do your hair and get dressed up. Because it's worth it for no reason at all. And eventually homework sounds nice and learning is exciting and the backpack fits so perfectly. Eventually you realize that being selfish doesn't work, because that's not how humans find fulfillment. The relationships come back into focus and you realize you miss something you never thought you would.

You miss the late night talks and the Man vs. Wild marathons with friends just because they need someone to sit with for a while. You miss the doing nothing in McDonald's because you're the one with the car and there's nowhere else worthwhile to go at 1 in the morning. You miss the hugs and tears and frustrations and love and hiccups and laughter that hurts your sides. The kind that makes you think you're about to burst from the inside. You miss it.

Because selfish can only last for so long.

To those recently admitted.

If you've recently been admitted to BYU and are starting to have some anxieties, here's my advice (note: some of this info pertains to all college life, some pertains to only BYU, so i'm sorry if you're going somewhere else but the fact of the matter is that i'm at BYU, and that's the college life i know).

Obviously I'm still only a Freshman and obviously I need to take some more of my own advice, but this is what I've managed to figure out in the past few months of my life:

Don't worry about the whole marriage thing. I've been on two dates since the I started BYU (this last August). If you want to go on dates, you'll find them, if you don't, you won't (of course, I'm personally frustrated with my lack of dates, I am terrible at flirting and all that... stuff). You'll attract who you are, so if you don't like those silly things, odds are you won't be doing TOO much of it (no guarantees).

Also, crazy concept that everyone seems to forget - YOU are the one who makes that oh so important marriage decision. So When people say "Oh my gosh, I'm so scared, I don't want to get married in the next year!" Well, then, uh... don't. That's what I say to them. No one's going to tie you up and drag you to the temple (and if they do, bad sign). I guess if you meet someone and get engaged real fast, that's a sign that he's the right one, right? And if that happens, you won't be worried.

Okay, that sounds like I'm lecturing or something. You have your head on straight, you'll be fine. That being said, my biggest regret to date in college has been that I've spent all of my time with the ladies. I love them all, but I'm in serious need of some testosterone. So don't be afraid. Don't be. Please please don't be.

And when you're sitting there your first night and feel ready to cry because it all comes crashing down on you in one sudden, swift wave of loneliness, it's okay. Go ahead and cry (go to the bathroom if you don't want the roommate seeing). Cry for a bit, read a book, get some comfort food, and go to bed. Then get up the next morning and try again. Don't dwell on those feelings. Also, I promise you every other person in your building is probably feeling the same way, or they will soon. It hits everyone at some point, it's actually rather hilarious to talk about it with them later and admit you all cried in the shower.

Heritage is cool, Wyview is cool. I'm in Helaman. Not where I wanted to be (last choice, actually), so make other backup plans. Sometimes, there are other things in store for you, so just make the best of any situation. Wyview is far away though, so that's something to consider. I know a lot of people that love it though, and if you purchase a bus pass, then all you need to do is schedule around the bus times. New Heritage? ROCKIN. Seriously. Get there if at all possible. Now that I think about it, I don't know how much of Old Heritage will be available next year. Helaman has turned out to be a really great place, too. So be open to options you didn't think you were willing to consider.

BYU is a really incredible place, and don't let anyone tell you different. It's popular with a lot of people to think it's cool to not completely obey the honor code. Silly as a lot of the rules may seem, however, there is a reason behind all of them. These weren't just designed to make you miserable and ruin your fun nights with guys. They will make your college experience better, I promise. The fact of the matter is that we all sign the honor code, so if you have a problem with it, that's fine - but why are you here? If you find it too restricting and are incapable of keeping your word, then by all means, find a different school. Don't pay attention to what friends at other schools post about BYU. I'm sorry they feel so strongly about a school they don't even attend. You're lucky to go here.

Studying with the spirit is such a unique opportunity, one that you won't find in many other places. Take advantage of it. Go to devotional, participate in your ward, do your visiting teaching, keep up on your scripture reading along with all the other reading you have to do, and say your prayers. Ask for a blessing if needed, you are always surrounded by a worthy priesthood holder somewhere. You get to start each class with a prayer - how incredible is that?

The school work is hard. Really hard. I saw a girl at another school tweet something the other day about how the class she was currently in was easier than her high school classes. Man, I was jealous. People think that BYU is all marriage and dating and weird things like that, but it's really challenging, too. Don't be disheartened when you look up at the TV in the testing center and see your first fail or C, or maybe even B, on a test. I assure you, you will live. Go take a break for a bit, watch a movie, then keep on studying.

Speaking of which, don't you dare just spend all of your times studying. Or all of your time socializing. Life demands as balance, and believe it or not that doesn't change when you get to college, though a lot of students seem to think it does.

Don't forget to do your laundry and eat food and get enough sleep. Sound simple now, but it's not. Your body is meant to get crucial sleeping hours in the middle of the night, and going to bed at 4 and waking up at noon each day is not an alternative to normal hours. It might be possible, but it's never advisable.

That being said, sometimes it's necessary to stay up until 4 writing a paper.

Be kind and cordial and considerate to others. Really, these are basic rules of etiquette, but people seem to forget it when they're walking around campus with their headphones jammed in their ears and hands stuffed in their coat pockets. The goal is class, the goal is getting up the RB stairs, the goal is getting indoors before you freeze. But not enough people look at the people they're passing and remember that each person is going through some of the same things you are every day. Not enough people simply smile and say hello.

Being kind is never out of style.

Get some "me" time. It's hard to find moments of quiet when you can be alone with yourself, but it's possible.

And finally, just enjoy it. College life is different. It's liberating and exciting and really quite awesome. It's not going to happen again, however, so take advantage of every situation that is presented. BYU is a pretty incredible place, you know?

Warning: this post has serious signs of a lovesick fool

I can't wait to be married, folks.

I mean, I'm sorry if that offends you or whatever. If you think I'm throwing away my life or something, or maybe that I'm going to go rush into a marriage without the necessary consideration.

Fact is, I'm not excited to just "get married". I'm excited to be married to someone I am very very much in love with, and who loves me back.

I won't bore you with the details of all I want in a man. I almost began to type it and realized that's pointless. First of all, because you don't want to read through it - either you have your dream, or your dream is different from mine. Second, because ideals change, and who am I to say what I do or don't want in my husband? I guess I'll know when he comes along and we fall in love.

I will say this though: I would greatly enjoy being married to someone like Gilbert Blythe.

The Gilbert Blythe from Anne of Green Gables - you know the one? If you don't, for shame. Go read the books and watch the movies, all of them. I finished watching them all over again (oh gosh, i've mentioned this before, haven't i?), and it was lovely. When the last movie finished and I experienced my traditional post-series sadness, I seriously just thought of how I want to marry someone like Gilbert.

And honest? I didn't say to myself, "I want to marry Gilbert Blythe". Because us girls get these crazy ideas of men from books and movies and say we want to marry them when the fact of the matter is that they don't exist. There is no such thing as Gilbert Blythe - he is just a beautifully crafted character.

However, I do so love some qualities about him. He's human, you know? And he has faults and problems, which I respect. But he's also just a truly good person.

Also, I do occasionally fantasize I'm Anne (for multiple reasons) and wish I could just get sucked up in that wonderful story of love. So many kinds of love, too. Not just romance (that's gotta be one of the best parts of the anne series - that it's about real life and growing up and changing and finding yourself and romance just happens to work in), but love between parent and child, real kindred spirits, bosom friends, and timeless memories.

But I realize that I'm not going to live on Prince Edward Island it 1910. Unfortunately, it just can't happen. I live now, and I am me. I'm not Anne, there's no Gilbert, and that is okay. That is more than okay, in fact. I love me. I love my life, even if I don't necessarily relish in every moment of it (which is so unfortunate really, because why not? anne sometimes reminds me to enjoy everything about life).

And someday, I'm going to meet my own personal Gilbert Blythe.

Well, It's Official

I have hives.

Seems my body is not reacting well to a small-dose medication I just started taking to help my skin clear up. In fact, it's not reacting well at all. I'm itchy all over the place and the simple act of washing off my makeup causes my face to get red and puffy.

Of course, you probably didn't want to know all of this, but I though I'd tell you anyway, since it's what's been on my mind lately.

I really love blog stalking. You know those awesome people that have thousands of followers and adorable families and stylish outfits? Yes, I like reading those blogs. I like reading other blogs, too, like yours. But they have pretty awesome ones. I'm talking bloggers like Rockstar Diaries, folks. I totally want to be like them, it's true. I just wish I could be as fashionable and cool and chic and vintage as they are, but I'm not. Which is totally okay too.

Last week was preeeeeetty crazy. 3 tests and two papers? Looks like midterms are upon us. It almost always seems that people have all their things on one week or the other. For example, all my business was last week, but this week looks positively delightful, while on the other hand, my friend Kate had virtually nothing last week, and a lot this week. I feel like it's some big scheme that's been hatched by the professors. Of course, it's not. But I like to think that.

(bad picture, it's backwards, and i also don't know

why there's a dolphin there, but you get the picture)

Anne of Green Gables. I've been watching it like crazy the past few weeks. I've always loved Anne (both in movie and book form), and my sister got me the full DVD set for Christmas this year, which just warms my heart. Really though, I could watch it all day. I'm currently on number three personally, but I started the first one again with some friends who had never seen it the other night. So really I'm just switching back and forth a lot, which is somewhat confusing, but mostly just awesome.

I've also been tweeting. Weird, I know. I thought I'd never do it. To me it always just seemed like a facebook status without all the other awesome things, but then I looked more into it and realized it's just different. It IS a status, essentially, but it's nice because it can be a virtually mundane thing that's going on in your life, and no one is going to care if you post it. You're not "clogging" up their newsfeed with tons of posts - it's not annoying (unless, of course, you're following about 500 people, in which case I suggest you prioritize). Also, on facebook I feel like I'm shooting for likes. So if I think about posting something, and realize it's not funny, I won't post it. But if it's slightly humorous, chances are I'm going to tweet it.

Okay, why did I just tell you all of that? I don't know. I think I feel the need to defend my decision to join twitter. The point is, if you just can't get enough of me, follow me. @AnnaELewis

I think I'm going to go take a nap now, and try to stop scratching.